I, for one, am excited about the holiday season this year. For the past couple of years, I think I fell out of love with the festive season – the expectations, the spirit, the hope of being loved the way one might need, or even just being unable to relax the way my mind and body craved. For a while this season, I have represented a long-awaited break from the burnout of work stresses and emotional distress. If I genuinely look back, I cannot even remember what I did or differentiate the days. But this year feels a little different.
I am by no means old, but I do feel myself getting older. This year has been an extreme learning curve in so many ways. I speak a lot in my sessions that to grow and adapt new and healthier coping mechanisms, we must unlearn and shed our past ones. And that takes time, patience, and heartache. I did precisely that. Now, I’m not preaching that I’ve completed that journey, but this year represented honesty. Honesty in who I am, who I am, and who I want to be. I understood those expectations that I had placed for a year, but further depicting why they were there in the first place. Now, to my surprise, life can be an absolute b**** sometimes because when I unpack them, work on them, and achieve them, I still wasn’t happy. It took more awareness and honesty to realize that maybe the life I had fought for so long might become true the way I wanted and needed, but I didn’t know how to be happy in it. So that’s the new chapter the new year will bring – learning how to be loved and accepting it.
This time of the year can bring much joy – materialistic and profound. But it can also be lonely in my way. Looking back and relaxing, maybe we aren’t exactly where we wanted to be, not having our loved ones to share or overall feeling melancholy.
Remember, this time will pass, and the best is yet to come. But it won’t happen if you do clear out your chimney for Santa to come. The best gift you can give yourself is to become the person you want to be.
Stay safe, everyone! Happy Holidays to you and your loved ones!
